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Local Man Dedicates Life to Valiantly Defending Hi-Point Online

Deming, NM –  New Mexico native Mike Yeetanelli announced earlier this afternoon that he’s quit his job as a contractor to pursue “a higher calling” – defending the good name of besieged low-cost firearms manufacturer Hi-Point in what appear to be obvious humor pieces throughout the entire internet.

“I just don’t get what’s so funny about a good deal”, says Yeetanelli. “People like to make fun of Hi-Point – but the guns are affordable, and they work!”

To date, Yeetanelli estimates that he’s managed to point out the merits of the bargain bin guns in approximately 6,700 threads and comments sections worldwide. “People mostly ignore me to keep making jokes, but that’s okay. I don’t really understand humor, but I do understand a bargain.”

When asked how he’d come to be such a staunch defender of the controversial manufacturer, Yeetanelli cites his deeply paranoid worldview and abject power fantasies.

“Most folks rely on one or two guns around the house and that’s that. But what if you aren’t near those guns when a home invasion happens? Look, I make a meager living, okay? I’m a blue collar guy, and Hi-Point was the only affordable option for making sure there’s a gun in every room of the house. Worst case scenario, I use one to fight my way to my 1911.”

Though he’s been fighting the good fight since at least 2015, Mike is excited to finally have the opportunity to point out that a “$150 gun is still a gun” full-time now.

Disclaimer: This is a satire/parody post, which may or may not use actual names in quasi-real and/or fictitious narration. So try not to get too butt-hurt about it.

Looking for a (mostly) serious Hi-Point Review & Video? Check it here!

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8 Leave a Reply

  • Commenter Avatar
    TxDoubleAgent

    I was highly entertained to see a YouTube video of them driving steel bolts into the business end of the barrel and lighting it off. They couldn't hardly destroy it. For me, I'm out, I've spent an extra $50 each on Taurus G2c's to "spread around" to rooms and all glove compartments. I have no reason or purpose to own one these when there are a few much better alternatives for just a little more. Now for their carbines...different story. If its ALL I could afford, I could rock one of these for anything that goes bump in the night.

    June 24, 2019 7:07 am
  • Commenter Avatar
    Dustin Tran

    I think its ugly and I've seen reviews of it malfunctioning, but: at the price and with its meme-like reputation, I'll probably buy one for the collection.

    June 23, 2019 10:12 pm
  • Commenter Avatar
    Michael Donnelly

    Like the onion take on hi-point lol. Although I must point out I own a hi point .40sw pistol as a truck gun and .45acp as just a range toy. My .40 in particular has actually less misfires overall than my FN 5-7. Ugly guns and they definitely should be made fun of for the looks their pistols, but I would have no problem defending myself with a hi-point over any other firearm.

    June 22, 2019 6:07 pm
  • Commenter Avatar
    Art out West

    I use to own one of the 9I'm pistols. I didn't like it. Mine jammed a lot (likely a magazine issue). I also owned one of the carbines in .40S&W. I liked it as a budget plinker. bIt was pretty decent. Both guns were bought used, and inexpensively.

    Budget gun wise, the Taurus G2C has removed all reasonable support from the Hi-Point pistols. Budget AR builds from Palmetto outclass the carbines.

    June 22, 2019 2:19 pm
    • Commenter Avatar
      TxDoubleAgent

      +1 on the G2c

      June 24, 2019 7:35 am
    • Commenter Avatar
      Rcorrino

      Unfortunately for us here in the occupied State of California, the G2C is illegal. The hi-point is not. So, if you want a gun in every room the hi-point is the only game in town unless you have the cash.

      June 24, 2019 10:19 pm
  • Commenter Avatar
    Johnnie davis

    I have the Hipoint 45 40, 9mm, and 380, they are great guns for the price.

    June 22, 2019 1:36 pm
  • Commenter Avatar
    Shepherd of Fire

    "I even have some in one of the closets, the outhouse, and in the shed. They were on a 2 for one special for the Fourth of July, Second Amendment sale." said Yeetanelli. He plans on eventually doubling up at each location, to 'increase redundancy', he says. "Well, I dunno if it's the ammo or the clip, but they don't always go bang. Plus, sometimes they pinch the top of my hand."

    June 22, 2019 12:32 pm
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